Thursday, 6 August 2009

Say It Like You Mean It

A nice little piece from Drum. In this specific context, I can actually see Somerby's point to some small extent, but in general Drum is bang on. One of the things that bug me about people in general, and internet discourse in particular, is how extraordinarily rare it is to see someone apologise for anything, [1] but Drum is entirely right that there isn't much motivation to do it if anyone on the receiving end is going to be a prick about it. Apologies don't have to be automatically accepted any more than they need to be automatically given, of course, but fessing up is tough enough without the impression you're just gonna get nibbled to death by the piranhas of the internet. Feeling that apologies are tremendously exposing and an admission of weakness is fairly ridiculous, but plenty of our brains work that way, mine included. Enhancing that feeling, either by demanding ever greater levels of prostration, or crowing about ones "victory", is just going to make the next apology less likely, in addition to frequently revealing onseself to be a dick. [2]
Learning how to accept an apology is as important as learning how to give one.

Anyway. Disengage old man mode. Normal service resumed, etc.

[1] A phenomenon from which I am not trying to exempt myself.

[2] There also seems to me to be ample anecdotal evidence that on top of everything else, the grace with which a given person accepts an apology is directly proportional to the grace with which they give them.

No comments: