Adventures In Alcohol

One of the drawbacks of working in a medical school is that when you announce your intention to consume your own weight in cider at your birthday do, people are likely to offer compelling biological reasons as to why this should not be allowed.  Following Plan A's nixing, I attempted to move onto plan B, which is to drink my friend Siew-Wan's weight in cider, she being the lightest person available for measurement.

Alas, this too was deemed impractical. She might be petite, but there's still an astonishing 92 pints-worth of weight to her.  It looks like we're going to have to make this a team effort.  In order to keep track of the resulting consumption, I have divided Siew-Wan into 92 areas, as shown:

Alcoholic drinks will be marked from the top down (she always claims alcohol always goes straight to her head), and soft drinks will work their way up from her feet.

Will we consume an entire Siew-Wan in seven hours? Will the soft drinks find themselves massacred by the alcoholic variety, or merely soundly thrashed?  Only the future can say!