Like It's A Coincidence Those Teams Have "Left-Wingers"

As official American correspondent amongst the loose affiliation of millionaires and billionaires and babies that make up my social circles (important note: I know no millionaires or billionaires, thought the number of babies is gradually increasing), I have taken it upon myself to keep an eye out for what our cousins across the pond are saying about the World Cup. Would their unique brand of distasteful nationalism win out of their petulant insistence that football is a girlie game in any case?

Well, I don't have a complete picture yet, but thanks to Media Matters, I can at least report one thing: the lunatic Right are apparently determined to outdo themselves.

I mean... it's just... well, goddamn. What can you possibly say about someone convinced that soccer is being forced onto Americans by the Left in order to prepare for when the Hispanics take over? Because it's a sport designed for poor people? Created by chopping the heads off of Caucasians, or something! I had to check Dan Gainor was a real person, and that he represented a real institute. And that I was reading a real website. And English was a real language, that these two could speak.

I have to say, though, I'm in awe of Liddy. It genuinely had never occurred to me that someone might argue liking football was a betrayal of American Exceptionalism. Remember, kids! Watching soccer isn't just pointless; it makes you a traitor!

Really, it's quite a trick. It's like Aesop's fable about the fox and the grapes, only in this case the fox is claiming he doesn't want the grapes anymore because he's recently learned they were planted by brown-skinned Communists in an attempt to poison Sarah Palin.

X posted over at Our Front Room.