Note The Subtle References To A Change In My Social Status

Senior Spielbergo has already covered this, but I think it's worthy of more discussion. First of all, can I get this for my iTunes, or do I need an actual iPhone? Because whilst I am entirely aware of both the function and the location of my "PAUSE" button, I must confess a significant desire to get this app, and use it alongside some of my favourite DVDs to discover exactly what this thing deems unimportant.

I'd also like to know whether it starts freaking out if it decides you've been "otherwise engaged" for a mite too long. "Hurry up and finish this off, biznitch! Katherine Heigl is about to take her top off!"

And no, Heigl was not chosen at random. I rather enjoyed The Killers on Thursday, but it made it very clear that far more useful than an app that tells you when you're about to be bored would be one you could take on dates to warn you beautiful women are about to disrobe, and you had better not look at the screen if you want to avoid some serious cold shouldering.