Our heroes have settled down to watch Outpost, a decision based entirely on the box's promise of undead SS soldiers. To begin with, though, all we receive is a bunch of stereotyped mercenaries cussing their way around Eastern Europe.
Big G: Why is that guy part of the UN?
SS: I assume he's a deserter.
Big G: So why is he still wearing his swanky blue hat?
Big G: Bollocks to nostalgia; he's supposed to be camouflaged.
SS: Maybe that's the only reason he joined the UN; a desperate need for a rakish blue hat.
Big G: The UN being the only place such things can be found, obviously.
SS: "Don't go, Taka! I have procured an azure stetson! Do not throw away your life!"
Big G: "No hat is worth being forced to stand in war zones and be entirely fucking useless!"
Eventually, the promise is fulfilled.
SS: Gasp! Zombie Nazis!
Big G: Are those the worst kind of Nazis?
SS: Depends on whether you think consuming human flesh is worse than trying to exterminate the Jews.
Big G: Werewolf Nazis would be pretty bad.
SS: Especially if they bit a Communist.
Big G: Poor bastards. Every full moon they are fated to pull down the monuments to the people that they have worked so hard to build.
SS: "Take that, proletariat; seig heil!"
Big G: What about Nazis that transform into tanks? They'd have to be pretty damn scary.
SS: I've heard the Germans were working on that at the close of the war. If they'd made up their minds between them and the Bomb, Berlin might never have fallen.
Big G: They got as far as a Nazi Gobot, but then all he was really doing was lying down. (High pitched voice) "I'm a Transformer!"
SS: Why did they choose such a girly Nazi for their experiments?
Big G: Girly Nazis are the most in need of cybernetic improvement.
SS: I don't give a shit about who needs the most improvement. This isn't a self-help group, G; we have to create a Nazi who can turn into a tank before the Allies reach the Rhine!
Big G: I guess if you're not sure the procedure will work, you don't want to risk precious butch Nazis.
SS: That's true.