Tuesday, 12 May 2009

Two Months On

BSG spoilers ahead, bromies.

For the first three years we had access to Sky, I had a distinct advantage over various other geeks in that I got to watch Galactica months before they did. In March, of course, the advantage became that I got to be disappointed months before they did. Some, in fact, have yet to progress beyond the tragic death of Felix Gaeta (my apologies to Chemie for bringing that up again). This, of course, provides an opportunity for experimentation.

Hypothesis: The ending of Galactica was so fucking awful that it would be near-impossible to predict the full extent of its relentless shittiness.

Experiment: To inform a fan yet to see the last six episodes that the finale sucks uber-balls, and invite them to speculate on the specific reasons for such unspeakable crapulage.

Location: The swimming pool, for some reason.

Data Set: C, because T was too busy actually trying to get fit.

Result: Subject becomes concerned it will "All turn out to have been God". He then expands on this principle by suggesting "Kara will be an angel". He concludes with "then she'll fly away in a light-ship, or something, and Patrick MacNee will turn out to be Satan". When realising that Patrick MacNee might be dead (he isn't), he removes this from his theory, settling on "God has been directing events, and Kara will turn out to be an angel and disappear, possibly on a light-ship".

Conclusion: Subject comes amazingly close to grasping the sheer idiocy of Daybreak, but fails to consider the possibility that the events he imagines will take place in the midst of a plot twist so hackneyed Douglas Adams was parodying it thirty goddamn years ago. We thus conclude that the hypothesis has been confirmed the fuck up.

1 comment:

Chemie said...

I hypothesise that a fan who had seen as much as 1 of the remaining 6 episodes, would guess the dire nature of the ending.

And no I didn't need a reminder of the final breath of hope, democracy and any semblance of decent episode writing, thank you. :p